Failure vs. Success

Failure is the result of an accumulation of poor thinking and poor choices. Its most dangerous attribute is subtlety. Little errors accumulate without consequence to capture our attention, thus we drift from one day to the next, repeating the errors, thinking the wrong thoughts, listening to the wrong voices and making the wrong choices.

If the sky had fallen on us when our first error in judgment occurred, we would have taken immediate steps to ensure the act would not be repeated. Unfortunately, failure does not shout to us as our parents once did. This is why it is imperative to refine our philosophy in order to be able to make better choices. With a powerful personal philosophy guiding us, we become more aware of our errors in judgment and more aware that each error really does matter.

The formula to overcome failure and transform it into success is: a few simple disciplines practiced every day.

Both success and failure involve future consequences, the inevitable rewards, or the unavoidable regrets resulting from past activities. So, the question is, why don’t more people take the time to ponder the future? The answer: The problems and rewards of today are so absorbing that we never pause long enough to really think about tomorrow.

If we did take a few minutes everyday to look a little further down the road, we would then be able to foresee the consequences of our current conduct. Armed with that valuable information, we would be able to take the necessary action to change our errors into new “success oriented” disciplines. In other words, amend our errors and develop new habits to replace the old.

The empowering magic of this is the ability to mend our thinking, thus, the first day of a new life leading to a better future.

Life Happens…Lose the Excuses!

The clamor of chaos follows the frenetic face of frustration and it’s not even noon yet! Sounds like your day? It was mine at 9:00 a.m.! Forget lunch…meetings, followed by conference calls and a slue of emails to boot. I finally have moment to breathe - yippee - I then realize it is 6:00 p.m. Where did my day go?

Overwhelming, isn't it? Do you have similar days? Weeks go by, turning into months. Have you ever said, “I’ll call”, “Let’s do lunch” and “I always have time for you”, but are your words and actions really in sync? Are you guilty of making these statements over and over? How many friends and family members are you ignoring in the process of managing your life?

In one of Aesop’s many fables, we are told of a boy, who fictitiously cries wolf on more than one occasion. When the wolf really appears, the villagers ignore the boy’s cry based on past behavior. Are you “the boy who cries wolf” with words and empty promises? Do you use life as your excuse for not keeping in touch?

In the technological world in which we live, there are no excuses! Email, voice mail and text messaging enable us to keep in touch using minimal time. Actions really do speak louder than words. In fact, actions yell integrity, loyalty, consideration and respect. Empty excuses, could have, would have, should have and my favorite - I’ll try - are not acceptable, period!

Be true to yourself and to others by letting your actions speak louder than your words. Life happens to all of us…lose the excuses!

Achieve Peace by "Doing You" First

Any level of stress or peace you experience is directly related to the level of stress or peace within. If you are at peace with yourself, the world will appear peaceful. Thus, the more peaceful your inner world, the more peace you will experience and extend to the outer world. The same is true with stress. The more stress you feel within, the more stressful your experiences will feel.

The following are the words written on the tomb of an Anglican Bishop (1100 AD) in the crypts of Westminster Abbey. They illustrate this concept and how one man recognized the importance of "doing you" first.

"When I was young and free and my imagination had no limits, I dreamed of changing the world. As I grew older and wiser, I discovered the world would not change, so I shortened my sights somewhat and decided to change only my country. But it, too, seemed immovable. As I grew into my twilight years, in one last desperate attempt, I settled for changing only my family, those closest to me, but alas, they would have none of it. And now as I lie on my deathbed, I suddenly realize: If I had only changed myself first, then by example I would have changed my family. From their inspiration and encouragement, I would then have been able to better my country and, who knows, I may have even changed the world."

Forgive yourself for any mistakes you made in the past and know that you are no longer what/who you were. When you bring your past into your present, you create a future exactly like your past. Living this way inhibits your peace and joy.

What you experience in your physical world is a reflection of what is in your mind. Changing the thoughts you allow to enter your mind can change your reality. If your mind lacks clarity, your physical world will also lack clarity. If thoughts of peace and love fill your mind, then your physical world will be equally as peaceful and loving.

To achieve peace, do you...any questions?

The Epitome of Selfishness

A very dear friend of mine shared something with me that totally blew my mind. Over the holidays, a long time friend of his was in a freak accident and passed away. Being a compassionate soul, he spent most of his holiday time off doing what he could for the widow and children of the deceased. The woman he’s involved with could not understand; she made absolutely no qualms about stating such.

Your eyes are not playing tricks on you…you are reading correctly! Can you believe the audacious insensitivity and outrageous actions of this woman? Much to his chagrin, a massive blanket of selfishness inhibited her ability to console her exquisitely handsome man.

Personally, I am mortified by the actions of a fellow member of the female race. Ladies, please use her actions as an example of what not to do. In relationships, as in life, it is about sharing and not all about you.